I’M still not over the fact that it rained for the entirety of the school summer holidays.
It feels like the kind of scandal that Nicola Sturgeon would have been urged to condemn and/or apologise for if she was still in post.
To make matters worse, Mother Nature in her infinite wisdom, decided to schedule a heatwave to coincide with the schools going back: so now our children are not only overtired and overstimulated, they are also sweaty.
MSPs were certainly feeling the heat as they headed back to Holyrood for the start of the new parliamentary term.
The nerves will be kicking in for Humza Yousaf (above) as he is set to face his first big electoral test as leader, with the Rutherglen and Hamilton West by-election confirmed for October 5.
Anas Sarwar has been busy working on a floor-to-ceiling mind map as he fervently plots out a strategy to distance himself from the Tory-lite policies of his London bosses that also allows him to claim credit for any Labour “revival” in Scotland that might be heading down the tracks.
Douglas Ross is too busy checking his phone to see which of his colleagues have most recently been forced to resign in disgrace to worry about anything else.
READ MORE: 'No credibility': Douglas Ross exposed in fiery FMQs exchange
It was perhaps his fellow Tory parliamentarians that he was thinking of when Douglas Ross asked the First Minister about taking action on crime.
He raised the issue of a police pilot scheme in the north east of Scotland, where he says frontline officers have been told to not investigate certain offences.
“Which crimes WON’T be investigated?” he asked the First Minister.
In response, Humza Yousaf quoted from the news release put out by the police about the scheme, which states that no further action would be taken only in circumstances where there is “no associated threat, no risk, no harm, no vulnerability … no proportionate line of enquiry for local officers to investigate”.
Douglas Ross (above) shot back: “So the First Minister is quite happy about that? That is incredible!”
He went on claim that the pilot treated north east residents as “guinea pigs” and said that Humza Yousaf wouldn’t let this “rash experiment” go ahead in Glasgow. He asked: “So why is he content to let victims in the north east go without justice?”
“That is complete and utter nonsense, turning one community in Scotland against another community in Scotland – what else would you expect from the divisive Conservatives?” replied the First Minister.
One thing that can always be expected of Douglas Ross is that he will double down on any point he makes, even if it makes him sound slightly deranged.
READ MORE: Tory minister claims Scots suffer 'Victorian diseases in rat-infested cities'
And so he went on: “People who report crimes will be told TOUGH LUCK and it’s open season for criminals under the SNP. So why is the First Minister telling offenders that they can break the law and get away with it here in Scotland?” he asked, somehow managing to maintain a straight face.
I think somewhere along the way Douglas Ross must have gotten confused.
Offenders can’t break the law and get away with it here in Scotland, that’s a privilege reserved solely for Conservative party cronies and donors.
“Douglas Ross with that question demonstrates why he should never ever be allowed to be First Minister of this country,” replied Humza Yousaf.
‘’Panicking people, alarming people, sensationalism – all for cheap political headlines. That’s all Douglas Ross is interested in.’’
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