IMAGINE it: you’re Jacob Rees-Mogg and you’ve just resigned because your new boss will probably sack you anyway.
Before you grab your top hat and gently stroll out the door, you’ll need to write your resignation letter.
So you grab your finest quill and ink and begin to jot down your reasons for going.
But before you do you are so overwhelmed with patriotism after imagining a giant Boris Johnson in a Union flag suit pushing Great Britain further away from the European mainland.
READ MORE: Jacob Rees-Mogg resigns as business secretary after Rishi Sunak enters No 10 Downing Street
In a daze, you realise you've scribbled all over what was supposed to be your resignation letter.
Still, in the hangover of Downing Street's party culture, surely no one will bat an eye.
That’s maybe the only explanation for what is apparently Rees Mogg’s resignation letter.
It had been revealed that the Tory MP had quit as minister for Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy shortly after Rishi Sunak was confirmed as the new Prime Minister.
His resignation letter was then released, much to the confusion of the general public.
Putting a doctor’s prescription to shame about the only thing The Jouker can make out is “Dear Prime Minister”, “the King” and “Conservative Party” – oh and the fact that he's pompously dated it "St Crispin's Day" ...
The shocking state of his handwriting is perhaps surprising considering he’s the same man who, upon becoming leader of the House of Commons, sent out a strict list of language rules for his staff.
Among the words and phrases considered unacceptable by the Victorian era’s favourite politician were “very”, “ongoing”, “I am pleased to learn”, “lot” and “got”.
The word “equal” was also banned but The Jouker will let you wonder why that’s the case.
READ MORE: 'Scuffling' in Commons was like 'Etonian version of River City'
Of course, the North East Somerset MP could have used a computer to type his resignation letter up - if only he had one on his desk.
But like much of the Tory party, Rees-Mogg hasn't quite moved into the 21st century.
But who knows, maybe it's my eyes. I'll leave it up to you to read the letter below.
If you ever find out what was written please let The Jouker know!
Why are you making commenting on The National only available to subscribers?
We know there are thousands of National readers who want to debate, argue and go back and forth in the comments section of our stories. We’ve got the most informed readers in Scotland, asking each other the big questions about the future of our country.
Unfortunately, though, these important debates are being spoiled by a vocal minority of trolls who aren’t really interested in the issues, try to derail the conversations, register under fake names, and post vile abuse.
So that’s why we’ve decided to make the ability to comment only available to our paying subscribers. That way, all the trolls who post abuse on our website will have to pay if they want to join the debate – and risk a permanent ban from the account that they subscribe with.
The conversation will go back to what it should be about – people who care passionately about the issues, but disagree constructively on what we should do about them. Let’s get that debate started!
Callum Baird, Editor of The National
Comments: Our rules
We want our comments to be a lively and valuable part of our community - a place where readers can debate and engage with the most important local issues. The ability to comment on our stories is a privilege, not a right, however, and that privilege may be withdrawn if it is abused or misused.
Please report any comments that break our rules.
Read the rules hereLast Updated:
Report this comment Cancel