NICOLA, I implore thee,
try very hard to adore me,
or I swear, I’ll ignore yea,
I am no bluffer;
you’ll never floor me,
I’ll make things tougher.
Nicola, I thought I’d mention,
to bring you down is my intention,
Your fear of me I’m now sensing,
you can’t deny it;
I seems I have got all attention,
and you are quiet.
Nicola, have you took a trip,
or does your shoulder have a chip,
have you buttoned up your lips,
I hear no fuss;
I have you in my Tory grips,
I’m Lizzie Truss.
Och Lizzie, what a load of tripe,
believe me I have met your type,
and with them, floors I’d wipe,
with simple ease;
you are a plum, not yet quite ripe,
begone dear, please.
George Robertson
Edinburgh
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