THE Labour conference came to an end today. Mostly it has been characterised by just how much parts of the party hate other parts of the party. Opposing other Labour factions is something that Labour is far more successful at than opposing the Conservatives.

Keir Starmer’s speech was notable for his declaration that Labour is the party of the Union, which was met with rapturous applause from Anas Sarwar and Ian Murray who were thrilled that their existence had been noticed, although it was also noticeable that Starmer spent very little time actually talking about the Union, and most of that was spent making unconvincing jibes about the SNP

Starmer seems to fundamentally misunderstand what drives support for independence, which does not bode well for his claim that Labour are the party of the Union or his desire for Labour in Scotland to recover from their current position as the used chewing gum of Scottish politics, stuck forgotten and dried up underneath the desk occupied by the things that the electorate of Scotland actually care about.

The National: Sir Keir Starmer

Starmer's big promise, the great hope that is going to save Scotland for the Union, is that Gordon Brown is going to lead a commission looking at a review of the UK's constitutional arrangements. Brown's review will doubtless then tell us that the UK needs to do all the things that he promised us it was going to do when he published the infamous Vow in 2014, but this time, pinky promise, he really means it, and a Labour party which can't make a polling dent on Boris Johnson of all people, is going to implement it if it ever gets back into power at some point in the indeterminate future. Aye, right.

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