LIFE in lockdown week two: thank goodness for a garden.
Before I start, please forgive the levity that this column aims to achieve. It’s just that that’s my remit.
My heart goes out to the elderly and vulnerable; the frontline workers; those infected with Covid-19, and those bereaved in circumstances that only serve to worsen the loss.
So our wee garden has taken on new meaning.
The things you might have taken for granted for so long often do during difficult times.
With the better weather and promise of spring in the air, the office manager/quarter master has taken on the new role of head gardener.
This is advantageous, as it distracts his attention from my tea consumption.
I’m relieved to report that restrictions have been lifted slightly since the first week of lockdown. A larger mug has been found which simplifies the 1.5 cuppas-to-bag ratio, meaning fewer TB1viii tea dockets are required as one bag = one big mug (we know this because QM took measurements).
The downside is that it’s one of those giant Sports Direct mugs (presumably the dimensions make it a great match for the giant calculators they sell. I have no idea what the market is for the oversized calculator, but paired with the giant mug it promises the perfect gift set for the thirsty hard-of-counting).
The mug also serves as a reminder of how badly many employees have been treated during this terrible time.
Another benefit of the garden is that it keeps the QM out of earshot when he’s whistling It’s A Long Way To Tipperary. And the fresh air also helps mitigate the soap-rationing he’s been adhering to with strict diligence.
Unfortunately, however, Head Gardener has been a little overzealous in his pruning duties. Here I was working away at the kitchen table, guzzling extra tea rations in blissful silence since the QM had packed up his troubles in his old kit bag and headed outside, unaware of the brutality being ravaged just yards away.
“Where’s the clematis, dear? You know – the one we’ve been nurturing for years which had formed a beautiful flowering blanket over the wee fence at the patio.”
Apparently, it will grow back.
On the plus side, the newly exposed fence will need painted and the freshly revealed wonky slabs will require fixing. These are Good Jobs to keep the Head Gardener busy. And out of the kitchen.
As I write, though, he has his QM hat on and is busy making a banana loaf while channelling his inner Vera Lynn (and taking a quick inventory of the teabag supplies).
Why is it that you eat less fruit when you work from home? Or is just me? Anyway, efficiency embodied, QM is making sure the over-ripe bananas do not go to waste.
Question: does banana bread count as one of your five a day?
Keep well and stay safe, everyone.
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