The National: WELCOME to the United Kingdom - where 52% of the public don't like their taxes being spent on an organisation that gives them the right to live and love in 27 countries, but would be happy to spend their own cash on making a clock make a sound to mark the end of that very right.

Makes sense.

Boris Johnson appeared on BBC Breakfast this morning and was asked about plans to make Big Ben, which is undergoing refurbishment, bong again the moment the UK leaves the EU. 

"The bongs cost £500,000," he said.

"But we're working up a plan so people can bung a bob for a Big Ben bong.

"There are some people who want to ... I haven't quite worked out ...

"Because everybody knows Big Ben is being refurbished ... they seem to have taken the clapper away. So we need to restore the clapper in order to bong Big Ben on Brexit night.

"And that is expensive. So we're looking at whether people might want to ... it seems to cost half a million pounds!" 

What a completely normal situation to be in. Everything is fine in the UK, nothing to see here! Just our Prime Minister stuttering over how he can get the public to fund a plan to make a clock chime. Because ... Brexit?! 

The worst part: People on social media joyfully responded suggesting each of the UK's 17.4m puts forward £35 each, and this would be a fantastic story to tell their grandchildren ...

The idea that people in this country would be willing to pay up out of their own pockets for this total nonsense but are affronted by the idea of their taxes paying for public services or the welfare state is actually difficult to comprehend. 

How long does Scotland have to stick around and watch this embarrassment continue for? 

Maybe we should start a crowdfunder to drown out Big Ben's bongs with Flower of Scotland.