Anne Hughes: 10 things that changed my life

1. The day I almost died

ONE thousand days ago I got a pain behind my eye as I sat down to dinner. Within a few minutes I knew it was something more than just a headache. A call to NHS24 by my husband soon became an ambulance hurtling towards us and someone with a kind, calming voice in his ear helping him hold our wee family together amidst the chaos.

I was in a coma when I got to the hospital – 12/15 on the Glasgow Coma Scale. It wasn’t a wee coma. It was a significant event.

I’d suffered a brain aneurysm. Simply put, some random head bump from my past had left a weakness on one of the arteries in my brain. That had formed a wee blister and on February 10, 2017, it had popped.

It took nine days for a successful surgery to be performed and save my life and a good few weeks longer for me to understand what had happened to me and how uncertain my prognosis was.

Recovery was arduous in the early days but now I see it as one of the luckiest things that ever happened to me. My burst brain has changed everything. How I feel about myself. How deeply I love. How I turn up in the world every day and what I plan to do with this precious life that was almost snatched away from me.

2. My mum

MY mum died of leukaemia 30 years ago. We were both too young. Watching her deteriorate when I wasn’t properly able to process the horror of our reality was quite brutal. Watching my wider family broken by the death of their matriarch and my dad and older siblings piece life back together was torturous.

I was lucky though – I have two big sisters who helped raise me into the woman I am and continue to support and guide me the way a mum would.

My memories of her are fuzzy now but I know what she stood for. She took no nonsense, said what had to be said and was scared of no one.

She was a strong Govan woman and I believe she’s still at my back. I know she is. She made it possible for me to live this life I’m having. Poverty and a lack of opportunity meant she couldn’t dream as big as me or my daughters can. So we owe it to her to soar into our lives.

3. Govan

I WAS born and raised in Govan and two years ago bought the house I grew up in. Now I’m raising my children as Govanites too.

When I wasn’t well a friend said to me that women in Govan were like our ships – strong and unsinkable. I remind myself of that a lot.

My mum and dad were both born and raised here too. Like many towns all over Scotland, Govan leaves an imprint on you when you grow up there. I’ve seen such love and kindness, poverty and despair on my doorstep. I think my roots give me a better understanding of what real life is like.

Now Govan is a place of such contrast. TV studios and Hollywood films are at home here. But so is hardship and struggle.

I’m proud of my roots. They made me who I am and Govan’s impact on me and how I step out in the world will always help form my decisions. I can’t unfeel the community I experienced growing up and I can’t unsee the hardships. Their impact is with me forever.

4. Meeting my husband

THIS summer I’d known my husband for more than half my life. I used an online calculator to work out I’d been with him exactly half my life on our daughter’s 16th birthday. I think there’s something quite magical about that.

Meeting when we were still students means we’ve been through a lot of life’s ups and downs together. No one has ever made me laugh as much as he does.

I always say he was the first person to save my life that night. If he’d suggested I go for a lie down I’d have been dead within an hour.

When I look at old photos I can’t believe how quickly our lives together have gone. But I really hope we’re blessed with the good health to grow old together – I think we’ll be a crazy old couple.

5. Chucking my job and going it alone

JUST over 18 months ago I decided to go freelance. I have an excellent professional mentor who believed that working for yourself meant you could work for who you wanted, when you wanted and doing projects you wanted to do.

It wasn’t in my plan but circumstances made the decision easy.

I do such a variety of work now that life never gets boring. I write columns, do a radio show, I’m a motivational speaker, host and mentor. I keep my hand in my 22-year career as a fundraiser too – writing strategy and developing projects.

The bit I love most is working with teams on improving their workplace culture or with managers in leadership training. I love the look of realisation on people’s faces when they recognise they could think about things differently.

6. Deciding I’m OK with people not liking me

THE obsession with followers and likes really bothers me nowadays. I worry we’re getting too far away from who we actually are and that authenticity has become quite a unique trait!

There’s nothing like nearly dying to know who your friends are. So when I walk into new places now, I go with the thought that I’m not here to make pals – I’ve got pals.

I’m a big character so I get that I’m not everyone’s cup of tea. I don’t like everyone I meet so how can I possibly expect everyone to like me? It’s a ridiculous notion.

And besides, there are 7.6 billion people in the world. If someone doesn’t like me another one will be along in a minute.

7. Mothering

I GOT pregnant with my oldest daughter around 17 years ago. That’s when I feel I became a mum. It is a great privilege to mother my two girls and wee boy. Passionate, funny, clever, challenging, they force me to adapt my thinking and behaviour a lot and push me out of my comfort zone so often that I’m getting to quite like it out here.

I think we all have a duty to mother our young people. Not just the ones we birth but the ones who happen across our path who could use some support.

Vic is 17 and lives in Malawi. I’ve never met her but when I saw a plea from a nurse friend for someone to sponsor her I decided to do it. I pay Vic’s uni fees and send her money every month to live away from her home and family and study to become a doctor. She’ll save thousands of lives in Malawi during her career. She’s the first person in her family to ever go to university. I’m so proud of her.

8. Interviewing the First Minister

WHEN the First Minister agreed to come on to Ignite The Radio Show on Sunny Govan Radio I was quite surprised and very delighted.

I didn’t quite know where I would take the interview but I always knew it would be good. It was never going to be political. There are better folk for that and my show is about what drives and inspires you. It’s about your purpose and intention with your life.

I decided the morning of the interview that I was going to kick it off by asking the FM if she’d ever experienced impostor syndrome. Her reply ended up being covered in almost every news outlet in the UK and beyond.

I was never mentioned in any of it, but I knew it was me who got her to speak about something so honestly. Something that no one else had ever asked her before.

During the hour I remember the look in the FM’s eyes changing as she realised it perhaps wasn’t the interview she was expecting when she walked through the door.

I love surprising people. I often describe myself as a “Bloshie Govan Hippy” – no one really knows what that is. So perhaps it’s no wonder they don’t know what to expect.

9. Joining the board of Children 1st

WHEN I was first asked if I’d consider joining the board of Children 1st I was so shocked by the idea that I dismissed it straight away. Having always worked in the charity sector I saw a “trustee” as something other than me. In truth, I probably thought I wasn’t qualified or worthy of it.

But when I questioned my reaction I realised that of course I could contribute. So I threw my hat in the ring.

During my interview I remember telling them that I would approach it from a place of empathy and not just sympathy. I know what it feels like for tough things to happen in your family. I’ve been in houses with no food or toilet paper. Ultimately, I recognised that helping future generations meant I would be contributing to Scotland in such an important way that I had a duty to step up.

10. Putting myself out there

DECIDING to put my writing into the public eye and begin a radio show was a leap of faith. It’s one I’m glad I took when I was just a year past my brain injury and my relationship with reality was a bit odd and complicated.

Going on TV with my husband on the People’s News on BBC Scotland back in February was a bit left field too. I still can’t believe I talked him into it.

Series two starts this week. We say stuff that needs to be said. We’ve both got a strong moral compass and have an opinion on almost everything. In series one we were probably a bit more reserved than we actually are because it was new. This time around I reckon we’ll be a lot more passionate and outspoken with our contributions.

Catch The People’s News on BBC Scotland, Thursday, 9pm

Connect with Anne at her website www.annehughesignite.co.uk