JACKSON Carlaw has just taken over as interim leader of the Scottish Tory Party. Today was his first appearance in Holyrood since then, and he was responding to the First Minister's Programme for Government.
All he had to do was follow the sheet of stock responses. Is the First Minister talking about the climate? She's obsessed with independence. Is she talking about the damage of Brexit? She's obsessed with independence. Is she talking about the weather outside? She's obsessed with independence.
Despite having such a low bar to meet, Carlaw still managed to fall flat. Instead, in the words of the First Minister, he managed to insults "practically every woman in the country".
After setting out a substantial amount of policy and detail on the climate, she pointed out Carlaw's hypocrisy on a particular point.
Sturgeon said: “Jackson Carlaw just criticised me for visiting Edinburgh Airport, but in his press release today he criticised us for not going ahead with cutting air passenger duty tax, so he's got to decide which side of the climate change debate Jackson Carlaw is on.
“I think it is probably embarrassment that is making his face go a little bit red when he looks at the achievements of this government compared to the achievement of his own party which is so obsessed with Brexitit's forgotten how to do anything else."
Describing his face as going "a little bit red" in embarrasment was, alas, too much for Carlaw to handle.
Instead of responding to the substance of what the First Minister said, he replied: "Listen First Minister, at least I've got a full head of my own naturally coloured hair.”
Above (from 51:08–53:23) you can see the full exchange, including how the First Minister responded to Carlaw's insult.
He has since apologised, tweeting: "Apologies all, that was crass. And fair play to @NicolaSturgeon for getting under my (very red west of Scotland) skin."
First Minister's Questions should be fun...
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