SCOTLAND’S first alpine coaster was opened to much fanfare last year – with reports in just about every media outlet (including The National) and claims that it offered “the ride of your life”.
The track – which is 980 metres in total, drops 170 metres, and sees speeds of up to 28mph – has been built on the Pentlands hills in Midlothian, and we finally made it over to see what the fuss was about.
First impressions
My first reaction was: Are we sure they’ve actually finished building it?
The area around the alpine coaster looks like a building site in places – and clearly that means a few things could be improved. Some, like the newly planted hedges, simply need time to bed in. Others, I fear, are more permanent.
For example, that the alpine coaster is on a steep gradient is something of a necessity. But the disabled access ramps – which are described on the website as “an inclined road” – are about as sheer.
Thoughts go out to the wheelchair user we saw leaving after their coaster ride, looking all too close to reaching its top speeds again as their brakes and aide struggled against gravity.
Built environment aside, the system itself was not clear.
We had tickets bought online, but these won’t get you on to the coaster. The tickets are to be traded for wristbands, which do that job. You don’t get the wristbands at the coaster – but from an unmarked, closed Portakabin down the way.
We were forced to join the couple in the queue alongside us in leaving our places – in which we’d been waiting for 10 minutes – to wait in a newly forming queue outside the now-open Portakabin before rejoining the queue at the alpine coaster.
The lack of signage meant we had walked past it no fewer than three times without realising its apparent purpose – even reading the paper sign in the window about the coaster’s weight limits.
It was far from a day-ruiner, but I don’t like queuing as it is – let alone doing it three times instead of one for no apparent reason.
That’s the complaints aside. Overall, the trip was undoubtedly worth it.
For one, the weather over the weekend was absolutely stunning. The hillsides around the coaster are covered with a network of walking trails with impressive views over Edinburgh, Arthur’s Seat, and the Forth bridges – even if the gorse on some routes is a little overgrown.
It was the perfect spot to stretch the legs – and let the dogs do the same – before joining the aforementioned queues.
The alpine coaster
Once you managed to get on the coaster itself, it was genuinely a thrill.
The top speed of 28mph feels an awful lot faster than you might expect – and any boy-racer hopes I had of not using the brakes at all were quickly shown to be a pipe dream.
The corners were exhilarating – as were the straight stretches when you could let it go at full speed.
Midlothian council leader Kelly Parry called it both “fantastic fun” and the “ride of your life”. I have to agree with her on the first one, but the second may be slightly hyperbolic …
That said, the main gripe with the ride itself was how long it lasted.
The coaster’s website states: “Including the ascent, the ride is just over three minutes.”
This trick – including the time needed to climb the mountain in calculating how long it takes to ski down it – masks the fact that the alpine coaster proper lasts less than one minute (unless you’re going very slowly indeed).
This is a common complaint for rollercoasters in general – who hasn’t whinged about a 30-second theme park ride after a 45-minute wait? But it is also one for which the alpine coaster offers an easy remedy: Do it three times.
Of course, this is reflected in the price: £7 for one ride becomes £19 for three – or £14 for a single and £38 for three for a parent with child.
That’s pretty steep, but probably worth paying rather than trooping away wishing you’d had another shot at the coaster – especially if you used the brakes a bit too much the first time.
But it did leave me wondering why we couldn’t make the coaster a little longer in the first place?
The longest in the UK it may be, but that claim is in doubt. The track is 315m uphill and 667m downhill for a total of 982m, according to Midlothian Council.
The Zip World Fforest Coaster, in north Wales, is reported to be 365m up and 710m down – for a total of 1075m …
Whatever the truth of it, the fact is that Scotland’s first alpine coaster delivers a short but seriously fun burst of adrenaline – and despite some teething problems with its setup and surroundings, it may well hit its target of attracting 150,000 visitors every year.
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