Can the Ghost of Christmas Future be part of the pro-Indy alliance for indyref2? — @realcraigy
THE Ghost of Christmas Future will certainly be very busy this year, given the notable rise in Tory voters within the United Kingdom. I have long held the belief that this country would be a far better place if Charles Dickens’ Christmas Carol was mandatory reading for all youngsters growing up. Numerous interpretations of the tale have appeared throughout the years – the two most effective being Bill Murray’s Scrooged and The Muppets’ take on the story.
No matter the version, the Ghost of Christmas Yet-To-Come is always the most bone chilling character, and the necessary evil that eventually shakes the reprehensible Ebenezer from his miserly ways. Accordingly, I would have to agree that such a personality would be an extremely useful asset to the Yes movement. Scottish independence and goodwill towards others should go hand-in-hand. We do not want to birth a nation of greedheads. Switching from No to Yes shouldn’t just be about borders; it should be about saying Yes to charity, compassion and love.
Will Santa be able to deliver presents following Brexit? After all, he is not British and I doubt that he has a British passport! — @SJCooper68
THERE is a tremendous irony to several right-wing newspapers claiming that immigration is a threat to Christmas. Consider, for a moment, that Christmas itself began as a celebration of the birth of a Jew from Israel. Subsequently, the festive season has evolved into a holiday based around a bearded man from the North Pole. There might’ve been much talk of British values of late but, upon close inspection, there is very little Britishness about Christmas at all.
For example, “Britishness” – as defined by the Tory press – would seem to involve inward thinking, xenophobic, flag-humping nationalism. If some Brexiteers had their way, an enormous wall would be constructed around Britain to prevent any foreigners gaining access to it. Yet Santa Claus seems to uphold a belief in open borders, as he completely ignores passport control annually on December 24. Good ol’ Saint Nick also demonstrates a total disregard for customs, bringing countless undeclared items into the country, as well as eight gravity-defying reindeer. This is a horrifying notion to the Ukip-minded voter. To the likes of Nigel Farage, foreigners are bad, and foreigners that access the country without a passport, via flying deer, are doubly so.
It doesn’t matter that Santa brings joy, happiness, and in his own deeply capitalistic way, improved business for the retail sector. For many Brexiteers, the fact that Santa has never been seen wearing a poppy or waving a Union Jack will be enough to justify a lifetime ban on him entering the UK. In fact, I’m surprised that Katie Hopkins isn’t already screaming about Santa being an illegal immigrant. Given her track record, she no doubt hopes that friendly Mr Claus dies in a horrific sleigh crash over the Mediterranean.
With all of this considered, I don’t think immigrants are a threat to Christmas – I think Britishness is. It is extremely probable that Jesus, should he return tomorrow, would be in jail by next week. A similar fate might also await Santa, himself a perennial migrant, should he appear in post-Brexit Britain. A foreigner without a passport who keeps asking kids to sit in his lap? Not under Ukip’s watch. Ultimately, the mythology of Christmas is somehow more real and less offensive than the concept of “Great Britain”.
In an Independent Scotland, what will replace the Queen’s speech? — @shell_head88
AFTER the horrors of high street shopping, delayed Amazon deliveries and the nightmare of present wrapping, Christmas Day is supposed to be the big pay-off. It is a day of fun, relaxation and heavy drinking. Why this must be ruined at the halfway point by a speech from an irrelevant monarch is beyond me. Christmas is a time to celebrate generosity and humbleness, which are difficult traits to reconcile with a family that owns more gold than it does toilet roll.
Frankly, I’ve always found listening to the Queen, with her diamond-studded tiara, to be quite condescending. Especially when most of us spend Christmas Day wearing paper crowns. I’d much rather the Queen’s Speech was replaced by something that would give families a real reason to gather around their TVs.
Instead of a Royal we can’t relate to preaching to us about values she doesn’t have, we could easily treat the nation to something with universal appeal. Why not an episode of Tom & Jerry? The only thing more brilliant would be livestreaming my Christmas dinner/drinking session from the Yes Bar. It could become an annual variety show featuring pro-Yes celebrities like Eddi Reader, Andy Murray and that bloke who played Boris in GoldenEye. Who wouldn’t want to see me and Chuck D from Public Enemy gathered round a piano, crooning such festive classics as Fight the Power and 911 Is A Joke? Or my sexy karaoke with Amy McDonald and Michelle McManus? That’s a party the whole of Scotland would love to be a part of!
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